Many people contact Fight the New Drug to share their personal stories about how porn has affected their life or the life of a loved one. We consider these personal accounts very valuable because, while the science and research is powerful within its own right, personal accounts from real people seem to really hit home about the damage that pornography does to real lives.
Xandrino's story shows how difficult it can be to spread the movement to any given community, but that being motivated by love can overcome obstacles any Fighter may encounter.
I’m Xandrino Mangunay, a Fighter here in the Philippines. I fight in the ring as an amateur boxer, and I fight for real love whenever I’m out in the streets.
Before knowing about Fight the New Drug, I thought that I could hide behind the small screen of my computer and watch porn and be fine. I thought that I could satisfy my desires without forcing or hurting anyone. Little did I know that a lot more was going on behind the scenes—but I thought that I could hide it forever. But because of Fight the New Drug’s movement, I realized that I can do something about the guilt that I was feeling and help others be informed about the harms of watching porn.
I expressed my desire to support the movement and later on received paraphernalia that helped me spread the word about it. And deep inside I was also hoping that this decision would help stop human trafficking and violence, and encourage others to join me and do the same.
Related: By The Numbers: How Porn And Sex Trafficking Are Inseparably Connected
In my desire to let others know about it, I went out in the streets to distribute handout cards and stickers. I waited at mall entrances, overpass, and street sides and approached people to start a conversation. And to my surprise, almost all of them took a copy of the handout cards and were quite interested. It was great! But when it was already getting late and I was on my way home, I saw some of the handout cards scattered on the street. I was so disappointed.
But what happened that night didn’t stop me from approaching people about the movement. In the workplace, I’ve been labeled as the “Porn Kills Love” guy. It’s a good thing because it opened up so many conversations with men who struggled and are struggling with pornography. I shared with them how porn destroyed me and how I was able to get out of it. It was funny and uncomfortable, but the best thing about it was we became accountable to each other.
Related: Rebels With A Cause: How To Join The ‘Porn Kills Love’ Street Team
I’ve observed that “porn” is a taboo word at our workplace and wherever I go, but I believe that it should be talked about more openly. In an oversexualized society where sex is already so common and yet not talked about or understood, more and more men come out of it defeated and disillusioned (I was one of them). Someone has to do something about it.
So to those who also want to be part of this movement, step up and do something about it. It’s not yet too late to start anew and ditch porn. Support FTND’s movement and let others know about your passion and involvement. You’re not alone. We’re fighting this battle with you.
Don’t be afraid to share your story and talk about your struggles. Inspire them with your story. And most especially, do it with love.
-X.
It’s All About Real Connection & Real Conversation
Sometimes it might feel like we’re alone in our fight and that the odds are stacked against us. That’s normal. But it’s also why this global community of Fighters is important.
Just knowing there are others out there who feel the same way, who understand the effects of porn on the brain and relationships, goes a long way to maintaining momentum in the fight. Raising awareness of some pretty heavy topics is hard work and more hands on deck make that work just a little bit easier.
And think about this: That connection you feel when you’re spreading the word or hanging posters or handing out cards? That’s real. It’s everything porn isn’t. So that’s pretty cool.
Related: What To Say When Someone Asks About Your ‘Porn Kills Love’ Tee
Ever spend time in the comments section of our Facebook posts (or anywhere on the internet, really)? Then you know how easy it is for people to say things they wouldn’t say to another person if they were face to face. This makes having online conversations about pornography difficult, but not impossible. (Just make sure you always keep it respectful, kind, love-focused, and stick to the facts.)
The conversations our Fighter gear strike up remove that digital barrier, making it possible to have an actual dialogue instead of shouting matches, too. Face to face is where it’s at. And keeping it friendly, light, respectful, and conversational is even more impactful. Practice makes perfect, so keep at it if you feel awkward at first!
When we have face to face conversations with people in our communities, at work, or with complete strangers, we can ditch our preconceived notions of who we think the other is and actually get to know each other. That’s what the movement is all about.
Let Your Street Team Kit Do the Talking
This movement is all about changing the conversation about pornography, even if there aren’t any words spoken. When you rep a tee, you can spark meaningful change on how people think about porn, and inspire lasting impacts in individuals’ lives and our world. This can happen even without a single word being spoken!
Let your tee and Street Team Kit do the talking. Check out the kit in our online store, or click below to shop:
Your Support Matters Now More Than Ever
Most kids today are exposed to porn by the age of 12. By the time they’re teenagers, 75% of boys and 70% of girls have already viewed itRobb, M.B., & Mann, S. (2023). Teens and pornography. San Francisco, CA: Common Sense.Copy —often before they’ve had a single healthy conversation about it.
Even more concerning: over half of boys and nearly 40% of girls believe porn is a realistic depiction of sexMartellozzo, E., Monaghan, A., Adler, J. R., Davidson, J., Leyva, R., & Horvath, M. A. H. (2016). “I wasn’t sure it was normal to watch it”: A quantitative and qualitative examination of the impact of online pornography on the values, attitudes, beliefs and behaviours of children and young people. Middlesex University, NSPCC, & Office of the Children’s Commissioner.Copy . And among teens who have seen porn, more than 79% of teens use it to learn how to have sexRobb, M.B., & Mann, S. (2023). Teens and pornography. San Francisco, CA: Common Sense.Copy . That means millions of young people are getting sex ed from violent, degrading content, which becomes their baseline understanding of intimacy. Out of the most popular porn, 33%-88% of videos contain physical aggression and nonconsensual violence-related themesFritz, N., Malic, V., Paul, B., & Zhou, Y. (2020). A descriptive analysis of the types, targets, and relative frequency of aggression in mainstream pornography. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 49(8), 3041-3053. doi:10.1007/s10508-020-01773-0Copy Bridges et al., 2010, “Aggression and Sexual Behavior in Best-Selling Pornography Videos: A Content Analysis,” Violence Against Women.Copy .
From increasing rates of loneliness, depression, and self-doubt, to distorted views of sex, reduced relationship satisfaction, and riskier sexual behavior among teens, porn is impacting individuals, relationships, and society worldwideFight the New Drug. (2024, May). Get the Facts (Series of web articles). Fight the New Drug.Copy .
This is why Fight the New Drug exists—but we can’t do it without you.
Your donation directly fuels the creation of new educational resources, including our awareness-raising videos, podcasts, research-driven articles, engaging school presentations, and digital tools that reach youth where they are: online and in school. It equips individuals, parents, educators, and youth with trustworthy resources to start the conversation.
Will you join us? We’re grateful for whatever you can give—but a recurring donation makes the biggest difference. Every dollar directly supports our vital work, and every individual we reach decreases sexual exploitation. Let’s fight for real love: